Its been a year.

It has been a busy year for the ClownStain. I have a 6 month old baby, and a different job.

Sad Day

Well, here it is. The day we have all been looking forward too. The day the obstructionists got congress back. One small step for mankind, one giant leap backwards for any progress we have made since 2008.

I think we were too nice to the conservitards. We pandered to too many of their childlike whims, and look where it got us. Thugs that stomp 23 year old women in the streets of Kentucky, and armed mobs calling themselves "Freedom Fighters" and "Patriots".

IN all honesty though, these clowns will have 2 years, and a lot of them will get thrown the fuck out of office, because, they are just stupid, arrogant fucks with the support of people who do not read books. They have aligned themselves so thoroughly with the corporatist interests, and they fleece the rubes into thinking they are "outsiders" and "mavericks" when in reality they are just angrier corporate jesus-freak jerkoffs than the greedy, drunk old corporate jerkoffs.

The wave that they are riding into the shore is one of fear, racism, and blind obedience. It is the wave of churches with parking lots to rival those of NFL stadiums. It is the wave of people so indoctrinated in Faux Noos that they actually believe the president of these "United" States is a secret Muslim. It is a wave of voters who cast their ballots against their economic self interest.

I just hope they are not too blind to see how their congress people will be screwing them in 2 years.

Don't Tase Me Bro!!

Welcome to another episode of Seattle Police: Excessive Force.

Thats right, our boys in blue decided to be liberal with one thing. The taser.

Imagine being a gentleman of ample proportions, and getting involved in a donnybrook with two other young lads, (substantially more fleet of foot!) and having some uninterested party call the police. The other two pugilists flee the scene, and you are left on your lonesome. Do the police come to your aid? Do they ask if you are all right? Ha, surely you jest! They attempt to take you by force, and when you decline to be cuffed and stuffed, they tase the bejeezus out of you. This is prior to any sort of identification. You could be the Reverend Al Sharpton for all they know.

After a brisk afternoon tasing, they keep you cuffed in an uncomfortable position and then do their paperwork. They arrest you and haul you off.

This was for a fistfight, one where you got attacked by two other guys. Yeah, shitty day, thanks to the Seattle Police Department.

its about time

Its about time the old 'Stain got back in the saddle and started publishing more libelous screed via the interwebs. The truth of the matter is that my blog epitomizes the core of amateur blogging all over America: Never has less been said to fewer people. The kicker is, after this 5 month hiatus, will I ever be able to get my readership back up to where it was? Hell, if you are reading this, we will be 25% there.

That being said, I started a new job in June, at an internet retailer, (seriously. I am not even joking about this.) and things are going OK. I definitely do not not want to f*** this up by running my mouth and jinxing the whole operation. Wish me luck.

So, I am back, and I will be doing a better job keeping my act together and rebuilding the trust of those who look at Clownstain.

Enough Already!

For the sweet love of the Baby Jesus, I wish Sarah Palin would shut her neck hole and fade into obscurity. It isn't enough that she botched McCain's presidential bid, and quit as governor of Alaska, but she is criticizing the duly elected president of the United States, and inciting violence and sedition. Sarah Palin criticizing Barack Obama on nuclear policy issues is like me, your Clownstain criticizing NASA on how they are launching space shuttles. Sure, we can do it, but in all honesty, we do not have the fundamental grasp of the nuances or the raw brain power to make it feasible under any sort of illumination.

Aside from lambasting someone with more brains in their left asscheek than in her head, Sarah Palin is a terrible role model for young women. Her rise to stardom in the ranks of the Tea Klan shows young women that, even if you are ignorant and a quitter, people will still hand you things if you are pretty and popular. This is a sad fact in today's society.

Another lesson we can learn from Sarah Palin is fairly simple. Leadership requires brains, ambition, diligence and judgement. Palin has ambition and a pretty face. Great for a "public persona" or "celebrity" or even as a marionette for big business; but terrible as a person ordained to show others the way. Fundamentally, she is George W. Bush with a 36C. Now that she is out from under the adult supervision of the Straight Talk Express, she is free to run her yap and stir the pot. Sooner or later, she is going to incite some reactionary Tim McVeigh wannabe to do something rash. She has nothing to fear though. She will just deny responsibility and walk away. Just like she did with the State of Alaska.

Rest In Peace

A small victory/taking the edge off the loss.

In the Land of The Free and the Home of the Brave, we have some gangsters controlling some really important things. One of them is health care. The insurance giants and pill producers have a stranglehold on Americans, and the grip does not seem to be loosening. They are the massive army, and it is a lopsided fight due to their ownership of DC and State Government. The only way to fight a battle like that is with the insurgency. The lessons we learn from the Jihadis can influence the way we interact with the insurance companies.

On my way to the pharmacy, I was listening to NPR, and Washington State's Insurance Commissioner Mike Kreidler was featured on one of the local news shows. This was interesting in the fact that Mr. Kreidler stated that, in the state of Washington, insurance complaints are handled very aggressively. In addition to handling complaints, the Washington State Insurance Commission's agents can help with questions regarding policies, and help the consumer get the most from their product.

Another lesson I learned was regarding the composition of medicine and patents. I spoke with my brother, who knows a thing or two regarding patent law, and drug companies can patent certain drugs that are concentrated in certain amounts based on "novelty" which means basically, that although something has been around for a while, if you cook it a certain way, you can patent it.

This is relevant for one main reason. The brand name drug costs a pile of cash, and if the drug is a common drug it can be COMPOUNDED to a similar strength. Thats right. Your 1% lotions and potions can be compounded at 1.01% and purchased for less than a third of the cost. Chances are your doctor will play ball when you ask for it. You have to go to a compounding pharmacy, but that is just a trip to the google machine to find one. So, if you get an exorbitant prescription, check on it. It might be available at a lower price.

Sometimes the right things happen in sports.

Sometimes the right things happen in professional sports. Sunday night that was true. The New Orleans Saints won the Superbowl. No questions asked. It was a good game.

The New Orleans Saints have never won a Superbowl, and winning this one was a good start to a possible dynasty.

In addition to the impact this has on a team, their is a significant impact on the city of New Orleans. Thousands of tourists came to the city of New Orleans to watch the Superbowl. It kicked off an extended Mardi Gras Season, and will bring millions of dollars into the city.

Lots of sportswriters and other people associated with public commentary have issued statements about the healing of NOLA, and how this is an integral step, but I think that is kind of a half truth. Indianapolis is also the capitol of a region in crisis, and that victory would have meant a lot to the citizens of that particular area. Yeah, the Superbowl was a big step for the Saints, but it is going to take a lot more to get that city back on its feet.

Truth.

"US Health Insurers Enter Earnings Season With Changed Climate"

Yeah, thats it. Thank god that the health insurance companies are making money. That is the tagline of a Wall Street Journal article. Thanks to Martha Coakley punting Ted Kennedy's senate seat into the hands of the republicans, Joe Lieberman's ol' lady will be getting that bonus, and health care reform will be getting the shaft.

Ted Kennedy's Senate seat is a consecrated institution, something held dear to the hearts of progressives all across our lands, now it belongs to some lock step, empty suit douche bag with impeccable republican credentials who plans to spit on Uncle Ted's grave.

Martha Coakley really Al Gored this one. She could have kept things on track to America's recovery, but instead, she fumbled the ball on the 5 yard line. Now Mr. Scott Brown is going to take Kennedy's hallowed seat and use it as a toilet for the neocon fascist agenda. She let down Massachusetts and let down America. Ted Kennedy would make sure she was wearing her seatbelt when he drove her home after a party.

Here We Go!

in 17 hours it will be the first anniversary of the most life changing experience I have had. I still feel guilty about it, and I have not recovered from the event. I have not recovered financially, or professionally.

On January 5th, 2009 I was at the wheel when the F/V Independence ran aground in the inside passage of British Columbia. I was very lucky that morning, the vessel was only capable of around 7 knots, and that particular body of water is very deep all the way to the shore. The damage was relatively superficial, and everyone thought I was going to keep my job. They were wrong. The company cut me loose after promising to keep me employed, and the Coast Guard suspended my license for 4 months.

I am writing this in hopes that it helps me get over the event, and that it helps me move on. People keep telling me that no one got hurt, the hull did not rupture, no oil got spilled, and the only people that were scared were myself and the captain. I still feel bad about it, and I would like to be back where I was financially and professionally.

It did make me appreciate a lot of things. I have an awesome wife who stood by my side through the whole kerfluffle, and I have great friends who helped me as well. Yeah, I am not making big money, and yeah, the job I had since then was utterly terrible, but I am alive, well, and I have learned something. Any trace of hubris has vanished, and I think I am a better person.

Fuck 2009.

Dear God. I hope 2010 is better than 2009. I, along with a lot of other people had a pretty miserable year. I lost a job, along with my identity, self respect and professionalism; and did not find work for 4 months. I took a job which was soul crushing and shitty. I was professionally marginalized and meagerly compensated for pouring a lot of myself into the organization. I was slightly relieved to get laid off, except for the impending doom feeling. I had some medical issues, and I am still trying to get back on the right track.

I am not sure if everyone reading this can empathize, but I know a few can. 2009 was a shit roller coaster, and I think we are all hoping for a new beginning in 2010. Happy New Year.

Theres a storm brewing.

Yeah, thats right. I did something that fit right in my wheel house. No one was surprised. On Saturday, my buddy and I brewed some beer. We like to drink expensive, craft brewed beer, so we took the next step and made our own. Hopefully it comes out well. We went to a place that provided equipment and guidance. WE bought our ticket and took the ride. Right now, we are waiting for it to ferment, so we can go bottle it. My buddy and I chose a Belgian type triple ale, for a few reasons. The first being its relatively high alcohol content. Thats right, the shit will get you drunk. It has twice the octane on traditional american lagers and pilsners like Budweiser or or Coors. Second, it tastes pretty good. It does not taste like Old Dirty Homeless Guy Shoe Ale. Not too hoppy, and not too bitter. It will taste like beer, not like shattered dreams. The experience was pretty good, with the exception of my brewing partner letting the kettle boil over. The brewmasters at the spot were very helpful, and they offer a huge variety of recipes. So, if you are ever wanting to go brew some really awesome beer, get your ass to Gallaghers, Where U Brew. http://www.whereubrew.com/

Suck it Trebek.

Its been too long

Hey there folks. I am sorry I have not posted in a while. I can't use the excuse of being busy, because I lost my job. One business day after I was eligible for benefits. Funny how that works. It almost seems like they might have planned that layoff for a specific period of time. Huh. Three days later I received the invitation to the company Christmas party. Somehow I doubt I will be attending that one. Nice they could do that before the holidays. I do not want any of that pesky disposable income getting in the way of Christmas shopping. It just complicates decisions. Its really the thought that counts.

Now that I have my petty bitching out of the way, I have a serious issue to discuss. Recent tragedies make my horseshit pale in comparison. It has been a week since the execution of four Lakewood Police officers in a coffee shop. The perpetrator has been subsequently killed by a Seattle Police officer.

All of this could have been avoided, had the legal system done its job. Mr. Clemons was serving a 108 year sentence for a series of violent crimes, and Mike Huckabee granted him clemency on his sentence, pretty much because he "found god" and he planned on leaving the state, because he had "job prospects" and family in Washington. Had he stuck with his original crimes of robbery, assault and child rape, Arkansas' plan to get him out of their hair would have been just peachy. He was wanted in Arkansas for another string of crimes on top of the 108 year sentence that was forgiven; but when he was inevitably arrested in Washington for child rape and some other nonsense, Arkansas chose not to extradite. Imagine that. They did not want another low life within their borders. They decided to dump this asshole on Washington. That is about where Mike Huckabee's and Arkansas' responsibility ends. Now that Mr. Clemons was in Washington, a judge allowed him to post bail. Apparently this judge did not read, or did not place any credence in the extensive dossier of legal kerfluffles that Mr. Clemons found himself entangled in. Now, in addition to the failure of this judge, a bondsman posted a bond for Mr. Clemons. The bondsman took a gamble, and now will have egg on his face, if he keeps his business. All of this could have been avoided, had the state of Arkansas not given Mr. Clemons a premature release. If that failed, there were two other stops in place, the judge, and the bondsman. If either of these jokers had done their homework, none of this would have happened. If the judge had looked at the case file for this career criminal, accused of sexually abusing a 12 year old girl in the state of Washington (among other things), and wanted on 8 warrants in Arkansas, and shown some JUDGEMENT, and some judicial common sense by denying bail to this degenerate, 9 kids in Lakewood would still have their parents tonight. This horrible tragedy is an example of a complete and utter failure of the system. Arkansas completely abrogated responsibility for one of its citizens, and a judge glossed over the detailed history of an inveterate criminal. Now four officers who served their community honorably are dead. WE have plenty of laws on the books to prevent this sort of crime from occurring, however, laws are useless if they are not enforced by diligent members of society.

Team Levi

Well, here it goes. I was wrong. The Palins are not helping the Johnstons. In fact, the opposite seems to be true. We have a real barn burner going here. Sarah Vs. Levi. That's whats hot in the streets right now. Levi got himself all churched up and is hitting the circuit. Bringing the fucking pain. He will be throwing some heat towards the Palins and eliminating her chance of running for president. I am surprised there have not been any publicized death threats coming from her legion of slack jawed, as swipe followers.

All kidding aside, this dude is what that shit heel clan fears most. He is the light of day peeping under their rock. He has inside information. Furthermore, he is too dumb to be afraid. He posed nude for Playgirl magazine. His wiener will be public domain. Doubtful he will inspire as much perverted fantasies as a shirtless Taylor Lautner, but he might pick up a stalker or two. (From middle aged gay rodeo enthusiasts as much as teenage girls breaking into their mom's secret porn caches.)

Anyhow, this cat is Sarah's worst nightmare. The camera loves him, most people know he is dumb, but he does not say enough to totally confirm it (short answers would have saved Sarah a lot of grief) so he gets a pass on a lot, plus his intentions are all noble, according to the mainstream media. He just wants to see his kid.

One thing that concerns me is the fact that we have not heard anything of real note from Todd Palin. I mean, this kid knocked up the guy's daughter and gave his wife the media equivalent of a Cleveland Steamer. A real Alaska Man would go into his bedroom closet, get his AR-15 and baseball bat, or maybe his slug gun, drink a pint of Wild Turkey, and go kill the offender. This lack of significant response is kind of suspect, and it leads me to believe that Levi might die in a "Hunting Accident" or be crippled "Snowboarding".

I am sounding the trumpet. For everyone who has a real stake in this, take up the cause! Michael Moore, lend Levi your house guard. Barbara Streisand, get on the phone with the Mossad. Oprah, get your force field machine out of your Favorite Things hangar. Protect Levi.

Washington State: Government Inaction

Here we go again. Another Washington institution shipped out to a flyover state. Boeing was more than happy to send its second production line for the 787 Dreamliner to South Carolina rather than Everett, Washington, which has a long history of building planes. Allegedly, Sen. Patty Murray (D) tried to keep the line in Washington, but her bid was largely ignored. The State of South Carolina put together an attractive incentive package, which included bonds for construction as well as 3rd World style labor pools.

On one hand, I believe that Boeing had its heart set on saying goodbye to the Union Machinists, but I find it hard to believe that the government of Washington tried to hard to keep that plant in the Evergreen State. After the half-assedness of the Save Our Sonics effort, I do think that state and local politicians punted the hell out of this one.

The people who would argue that the savings get passed down to the consumer are completely full of shit. I challenge someone to find airline ticket savings as a result of Boeing's new commitment to Scab Labor. So, it really boils down to corporate greed and a pliable workforce. I have a feeling that the fine people of South Carolina will be so happy to have jobs that the thought of a Machinist Strike will never enter their brains.

The state of South Carolina is also in for a rude surprise. Boeing will use them for all they are worth, and when the labor pool organizes or demands better pay and benefits, Boeing will pack up and ship the plant somewhere else, and South Carolina will be like a trophy wife on the shit end of a pre-nup.

In summary, I think South Carolina made the right moves for South Carolina, bringing in some jobs for their people, and a lot of the country is just thankful that the plant is not in China. For now.

Remember everyone, real jets are made in Washington.

Big Sack of Awesome.

This guy did something awful in a former life. Then he totally redeemed himself, but the gods dicked up the paperwork a little bit. Not enough to fuck him, but enough to give him the short end of the stick in the looking normal department.

Now, I have a pretty strong hypothesis about this cat. From the looks of inspecting his work and seeing his website, he is fairly computer literate. Second; I think he also has a fair amount of disposable income (owning multiple utilikilts is not cheap!). Finally, I get the impression that he came to party. Every photo he is in looks like he is having an awesome time.

The summary of all of this, is that he is the Ayatollah of Nerds. He goes to every convention, role-playing, star wars, comic book, or S&M. (We all know nerds have totally pwned the bondage scene.) He takes pictures of nude and scantily clad women for a living. I am fairly convinced that if you needed to borrow a cup of awesome you could swing by his house. He probably has a 50lb. sack in his pantry. I get the impression that his phone probably has faster internet than 91.8% of the households in America. He just seems dialed in to all of the fun. I imagine that if you went out to dinner with him, he would take you to some hole in the wall that no one knows about, and it turns out to be the best sushi restaurant in the city. He would also act like it was no big deal that you just ate the best unagi hand roll ever made.

I also have another hypothesis. He was not born this awesome. The simple fact is, he has probably been short and portly since he was around 11 years old. He probably got hassled a fair amount, but one day vowed to be so rad that porn stars and Lemmy Kilmister wanted to be his friend on Facebook. Anyhow, check out his blog, you will be impressed by his body of work.

http://photognome.livejournal.com/

Usually I do not do this...

Usually, I do not do this, but I want to give a big shout-out to the Thorp Mall, in Thorp, Washington. Right off of Interstate 90, before you get back into the Cascades to wander back into Pugetropolis, is the scenic town of Thorp. If you are not paying attention, you will miss it, and it will be your loss. The large, barn-like structure houses a fruit stand on HGH. They have seasonal fruit and vegetables from local growers, as well as a selection of wines from local vineyards. I was thoroughly impressed. If you are driving over the mountains, do yourself a favor and stop there.

I think this is also a good indicator of the way Eastern Washington is going. They are getting their shit together. The viticulture is flourishing, and that brings a lot of folks in to experience what the place has to offer. What gives it another star is the wine country is located in a very productive agricultural area. This gives the place access to the freshest meat and produce, thereby producing truly awesome local pairings. Enjoy!

No shit Sweden.

Wow. I just turned over a leaf and saw the nexus. Although I am usually a big proponent of many things Scandinavian, I recently discovered thelocal.se . This particular rag is Sweden's online English newspaper. Talk about some really, really hard hitting journalism. When I perused it, I was whacked in the head by the obvious bat. What bothers me is not stupid "journalism" , but the fact that it came from Sweden. I am just disappointed. I expected better from Sweden. Usually they are serious and progressive, world leaders in human rights and responsible industry, but this newspaper had the the great story of "Popular kids become healthier adults". Really Sweden? Are you fucking kidding me? No shit. I think if we all connected the dots, we would come to that conclusion. Generally popularity does not involve sickliness, and kids who get shit on generally have a hard time with life, which leads to some issues.

Another Pulitzer candidate is "Young men at greater risk for alcohol dependence". Wow. Thanks. I could not figure that shit out. Goddamn, if you are in a culture where swilling beer is as cool as it is everywhere but goddamn Utah, of course that is going to happen. Dudes practice that. If this is coming as a surprise to you, you ought to crawl out from under your rock and let the light of day shine into your sad little world.

I just don't know. I thought the US had the franchise on silly, obvious shit, but I was wrong.

Sweden, straighten your shit up.

fessin' up.

I admit it. I confess. I think I am starting to find a pigeonhole. At one point, I thought I was special. I thought I was unique. Now I realize I am dead wrong. I play board games. I have a twitter account. I drink craft beer in 22 oz. bottles and scorn those who drink regular, cheap, lagers and pilsners. I am part of the Northwest Counter Culture Trash. I own multiple guns, but I voted for Obama. I work on my own vehicles because it is cool. I have a subscription to Wired magazine although I am not terribly on the ball when it comes to computers. I am in my own little world, surrounded by people who think and act very similarly to me. None of us will set foot in a Wal Mart, but we have no problem playing on a Wii built by 12 year old Chinese kids. We bitch about all the hormones in beef, but we eat sushi loaded with mercury. We like little projects and hacks for iPods. None of us will drink Folger's Coffee. I dunno, it is cultural elitism at its worst. We like to judge how other people raise their kids, but we do not have kids of our own. We are the young, angry, liberal douchebags who will inherit the country, and inflict our will on the McCain voters. We are Barack Obama's base. The kinda haves and the wish they hads.

Fuck it. Now that is off my chest, I am going to drink another craft beer and check out best of Craigslist.