digital transition

Its coming up quick folks. The digital transition is beating down our door and we must be prepared for it. If you are already a cable subscriber, fear not; the cable company has you covered. If you are using regular bunny ears, you probably don't care anyway and are hosed. 

The truth of the matter is that a lot of people might be better off if their TV went away. I know, that since paring down my cable to basically network TV and discovery channel, I have been reading more, corresponding more, and getting outside more. I am not TV free, but, the constant stream of stupid from the waves of the idiot box are affecting me less. (Probably not reflected in my blog) 

In any event, this is one of the death throes of television as a medium. It is also a sign of socioeconomic stratification. People without broadband Internet access and a certain level of literacy are being left behind. If you cannot fire up the Internet or effectively derive meaning from a newspaper, your news and knowledge of the world dies if you do not update your TV antenna.

Corporations are running scared. The popular advertising outlet in many homes dies with the new digital signal. This means that they had to go out and convince the government to subsidize many boxes for people who could not afford them, because, unlike freedom, or education, or health care, television is a god given, inalienable right. The only hitch is that the government did not subsidize enough, and that people who could afford to upgrade their equipment snarfled up more than their fair share of the coupons. Imagine that. Greed. Imagine how pissed the major advertising buyers would be, that instead of giving people coupons for TV descramblers, we gave them subscriptions to Time, Newsweek, Mother Jones, Wired, or some other magazine that does not talk about the statutory relationships of Miley Cyrus. Holy jeez, we would be in for a shit show. 

 

I would like to believe that this could be an awakening, where the hypnotized masses throw off their shackles and join the experiment of democracy. I would like to believe that people will turn off their phased out TVs and pick up newspapers or read the news on the Internet, but I doubt that will happen. The folks who cannot afford cable or upgraded descrambler boxes are the same folks who have been marginalized for decades now, will continue to be marginalized in America.  

goodbye pontiac :(

Well, that's it. GM in its desperate attempts to stay above the quicksand is pulling the plug on Pontiac. We are saying goodbye to the brand that brought us the muscle car era as well as the Bandit Car, Monkeemobile, and the soul of Ricardo Montalban's own Stutz Blackhawk. 

As much as I love the bitchin' rides brought to us by Pontiac, I realize that the failures of branding were apparent in the Pontiac line.  Since 2002 and the demise of the F-Body, Pontiac has been without a flagship.  Other than the Aztek, which was the ugliest car ever built, it is hard to actually name a post 2002 Pontiac that means something. GM neglected Pontiac with uninspired designs to the point that the brand just started shriveling up. 

That's the shit of the situation, the brand lost its direction and turned into the boring line for GM. Pontiac was the uncle that used to bring a trunk load of illegal fireworks for a kid's 9th birthday, but found Jesus after he got into AA.  Pontiac was the 35 year old guy with the cowboy hat and Oakley Razorblades that asked high school juniors if they "liked to party", and then found Jesus after a motorcycle accident.

I guess what really happened is that Pontiac found Jesus. Not the James Brown Church in Blues Brothers Jesus, but the weird cable channel and promise ring Jesus.  It went from a vehicle that was very difficult to have sex in, but you would definitely get some with, to vehicles like the Aztek or Montana that if you were driving one, you had plenty of room to screw, but no one would screw you in it.

Gone are the days of Burt Reynolds traveling interstate through the South while being pursued by the Smokeys. Gone are the days of guys with mullets doing cocaine and crashing their Firebirds into the tops of trees. Gone are the days of the brand that really said "America, FUCK YEAH!"

Complete Disgrace

In recent news, the case of a 13 year old girl being strip searched has reached the high courts. In 2003 school authorities detained and strip searched 13 year old Savanna Redding on the suspicion of her posessing ibuprofen. Thats right folks, you can be arrested and strip searched in an Arizona school for probable cause of posession for a perfectly legal anti-inflammatory. 

This strip search of a 13 year old girl went beyond bad judgement and into to the realm of criminal negligence. If a minor has to be accompanied by a parent to speak to police, how is it that school authorities can detain and strip search a child without parental consent? 

This is also a case of coersion of a child by an authority figure.  That particular crime is morally reprhensible. child coercion is the stock and trade of pederasts and other such troglodytes. Using ones authority to undress a teenage girl is usually punished by 3-5 years state time and a profile on the social networking site "Megan's Law" or a promotion in the Fundamentalist Mormon church. 

This also goes deeper than being an asshole that pushes kids around. It is modern post-Columbine, Post- 9/11 snitch and police state thought. We are so afraid of the possibility of harm coming to our society that we hand over our rights like they were over due library books.  The fact that this even made it into the school rules is a pretty sad commentary on our society.  Hopefully the supreme court rules the right way and issues a severe opinion on strip searches.

ARGHHHH! Thar Be Pirates!!!

In recent news, Captain Richard Phillips was released by Somali pirates.  These pirates apparently did not want to die immediately. They were under the gun from the USS Bainbridge, and had Captain Phillips been killed, their lives would have been forfeit.

The American Merchant Marine has a long history of dealing with some pretty severe circumstances, from blockade running to avoiding U Boats during WWII.  During WWII the US Merchant Marine had casualty rates second only to the Marine Corps.

The following link gives piracy reports worldwide:  http://www.icc-ccs.org/index.php?option=com_fabrik&view=table&tableid=26&calculations=0&Itemid=82

Somalia is a very poor country. We all know that. We have seen Blackhawk Down and the news during the late 90’s.  This is one of the things that make piracy an attractive career. Have machete, will travel. Most of the times Somali pirates are just take ship’s cash or valuables.  Recent trends indicate however, that piracy groups are starting to work with Islamist militant groups in the region. We have to remember that the particular part of East Africa is in constant turmoil, and poverty, and thus is extremely susceptible to radical influence. It will come as little surprise when someone is attacked by Somalian Jihadis.

Now, congratulations to the crew of the Maersk Alabama. They were courageous in defending the vessel, and deserve to be lauded for their labors.  Hopefully Captain Richards will see some paid vacation or financial reward for his hardship.

This story goes to an important point, the benefits of flag. The issue here is that the US Merchant Marine is under the American Flag. That flag carries with it the protection of the United States Navy.  So, Somali pirates who might be reading my blog, don’t fuck with the US Merchant Marine. You were unsuccessful at taking a middle aged man from New England hostage. You might want to think of a new line of work.

Facebook Elitism

Besides the general state of the world, my neighborhood, and my country, one of the things that concern me is the state of my internet. By my internet, I mean the part that I routinely loiter in. It is my neighborhood. In MY neighborhood, particularly the block I call Facebook, I do not want certain undesirables.   

You should not use Facebook if you meet any of the following criteria:

 Under 18.

1. Had a kid before graduating HS.
2. Post Emo “Selfpics”.
3. Appear alone in webcam pics.
4. Have a state ID card instead of a drivers license (unless in the case of disability)
5. Use methamphetamines.
6. Already have a profile…on the Megan’s Law website.
7. Your profile picture has a Sears portrait studio background.

 Facebook is a place for people between the ages of 19 and 37. No more. No less. The standards ought to be fairly straightforward. Facebook is a serious part of the land known as the internet. It is a place where people connect with people that they have not seen in a really long time, work with, or some actual friends.  It is not a place for psychotic moms to convince other people’s kids to kill themselves.

Facebook is a place to show your pictures of your vacation to Costa Rica, you and your friends wearing your soccer scarves, or pictures of people of legal age imbibing way too much alcohol. Pink and black backgrounds with AFI music playing are not welcome.

 Call me an elitist, call me a jerk, but if I have to come out of my ivory tower, I am going to be pissed. Just remember, you goddamn kids better git offa my lawn!